A designer extraordinaire

It was a really sad evening for me yesterday when I learnt that my my dearest tailor Aunty Funmi had passed on. She wasn't just a tailor but a designer extraordinaire. I remember when I was going to get married and I wanted a cathedral length veil to match my dress, I went to this bridal shop where I was billed N15,000 for the veil. After speaking with a friend and Aunty Funmi, I decided to get my veil fronm Lagos Island market for N1,500 and Aunty Funmi converted my veil to N20,000 look alike veil at no cost at all ( I say 20k look alike cos it looked much better that what I would have bought for 15k). I must add that Aunty Funmi was the one who made my friend's bridal train's dresses last year, the only bridal train dress I have been able to re-rock confidently.

We had days when we didn't agree especially on price lol but far beyond that she was great at her job and on a personal note, she had become my friend. We might have lost a friend but I'm certain she's being given a warm welcome in heaven.

My title is?

Is this the old or new one? I was as confused as you are right now. lol. A colleague had asked me this question while I was appending my signature to an official document a couple of days back. Was I suppose to have a new signature ? Okay I recently got married to one of God's best creations ( Yes I said it. He is an absolutely amazing man) and I love him silly so I assume she expected me to have a new signature already. That is aside the fact that almost no one addresses me by my first name anymore.

I know we are a title driven society and there just has to be a Chief, Doctor, Mrs, Engineer, Pharm., Deacon, JP, Prophet, Mr. etc attached to our names  but then I wonder, does it actually change the fact that we are that. Just like when your name changes to Mummy Musa, Iya Bisi or Mama Emeka just because you were blessed with a child. As much as a child changes your whole life, does your name have to change as well? Does it make me less of a mother if I still want to be addressed by my first name after having four kids?

Please lets discuss this. Is it truly disrespectful to call a married woman by her first name?

Another expense?

                                                  Photo credit: weddingplannerpro.com


Wedding Planners ... Are they really necessary?

My Aunty Tope is a correct caterer, Uche my darling childhood friend is both a make up artist and a hairdresser plus her gele tying skills is gangstar, my mum knows Lagos Island market  inside out so shopping for Asoebi (family uniform) and wedding souvenirs is settled,  my dad's cousin is a coca-cola distributor so he would take care of drinks, emm what else do I need o... I can actually do it all by myself without having to pay anyone. Yes you can but one thing is outstanding. You can't stand around coordinating your own event on your big day.

With the extended family nature of our environment, it is usually so difficult to keep your guest number low and the larger the crowd, the more coordination you need to help your day look well put together. It can be very disappointing to see many months of planning go to waste simply because Aunty A and Uncle B feel they should order the caterers around while Sister G and Brother H feel they have sole rights to the drinks. Everyone feel they know you best and they are doing everything to help so that the party is beautiful, therefore they stand around looking for what isn't lost most times food and drinks for their own personal guests (no offense), the parents get off their seats trying to please their guests and in the end, the whole place looks so crowded and rowdy. In all sincerity, they are all trying to help out but the 'waka-about' usually just makes people lose concentration on the actual program.

As much as I am not a fan of expending all your life's earnings and going in debt for your big day, I also feel that our societal set up makes the need for a wedding planner/coordinator almost imperative. Even if you have all your vendors taken care of, I suggest you have someone to coordinate the day's event. It is very good if you can employ a professional with experience otherwise you can put a strong reliable person with a lot of zeal in charge of the day's coordination just so that everyone is not busy around doing nothing.

That is my two cents for the day. Do you have conflicting views? I'd like to hear them

Sooooooo beautiful but beyond budget

I went wedding dress shopping with Miss Tee on Saturday and it was so much fun for me though getting out of bed was a herculean task. Hate it or love it, weddings are beautiful and I belong to the 'love it' category so in spite of the struggle I had getting out of bed, I got to Ikeja before miss Tee.

I was sitting at this bridal store just looking through catalogs when I overheard a lady haggling over a dress with one of the sales representatives. She was obviously still unsure of the dress so she left the lady then sat by me to further look through catalogs. I started chatting with her since I was still waiting for miss Tee who had been held up by FRSC (story for another day) she then showed me the dress she was interested in and added that the dress was almost 50k above her dress budget. I adviced her not to hurriedly buy the dress as she might still find what she likes within budget. She took my advice and left the store.

Fast forward about 2 hours later, Miss Tee had arrived and we had visited 2 other bridal stores. We had just got in to the 4th one when i heard a voice shout 'Irene Irene I've found my dress'. The excitement was real and the joy was contagious. My dear wedding dress shopper friend had found a beautiful ball dress (just what she wanted) that fitted her like a glove for 20k less than what she had in her budget.

As she relished in the joy of finding her dream dress, I wondered how many people have fallen for the 'the first dress you try is the dress you should end up buying' story when in actual fact they are working on a tight budget wedding. I'm of the opinion that you spend it if you have it after all it is a once in a lifetime affair (hopefully) however I'm sure no one wants to go flat broke after you have had your dream wedding. So brides to be what do you think about having a wedding dress budget at all? Or are you of the opinion that a wedding dress should just be about what you love and not the cost?  Or should it be a combination of both? lets discuss.